There are a few things that guys tend to do when they want their girlfriend back that destroy all their chances without them even knowing it. If you want your girlfriend back you will probably be in a needy state because you got your heart broken.
You are not the selector and you are chasing a girl that has already rejected you. This is not an easy emotional state to cope with and make it look like you are unaffected.
The thing is… the more you like your ex… the harder it will be to get her back. So the objective here is to act cool, unreactive and not like its the end of the world because you are not together anymore.
When a guy is desperate to get his ex back it is not uncommon to be trapped in a downward spiral that makes things worse and worse. As time goes by they guy becomes more needy and supplicating. When the girl doesn’t care the guys reflex is to try even harder and make matters even worse. When you start doing supplicating and needy stuff you are not acting like a man… You start losing respect for yourself and you will become a sad joke to her.
Here are a couple of things that you should not do because they will make your ex girlfriend look at you in a condescending way and it will kill any spark of attraction that she may still have for you.
Here are some counter productive attitudes that guys have when they want to get back with their ex girlfriends:
I have been dumped by a girlfriend before and I know that in that moment you want to do everything possible to get her back. It looks like your life will never be the same and you feel really sad. You feel so desperate that you act without thinking and you think that by showing your “true emotions” she will see the light and fall in love with you again and you will live happily ever after.
Showing your “true emotions” would work if you came from a place of confidence and self respect… but it doesn’t work when you are a needy guy begging to have her back after she dumped you.
Have you ever had a needy girl wanting to be with you? Its nice in the beginning but its an annoying feeling after a while… For girls this is much worse because they are accustomed to guys chasing and being orbiters and overly obsessed about them. This triggers a reaction of pity, discomfort and neediness.
Some girls even tell their friends laughing… “OMG! I felt so embarrassed… he was crying and being so desperate… it was ridiculous… I told him it was over between us! He doesn’t get it! Haha!”
The important thing to remember is that the classic reactive moves of showing “your true emotions” won’t work. In fact… imitating and implementing those indoctrinated Hollywood romantic movie tactics are the biggest mistake you can make. A mans judgment is clouded at that time because you are being reactive and you come from a place of extreme neediness.
It is very easy for someone who is not suffering to say “Man the fuck up!” or “Don’t be a pussy…” and it may sound harsh, but when your friends say this they want the best for you. This advice on manning up is actually the best thing you can do, although it will be hard for you to accept if you are in “desperately in love” with your ex girlfriend.
The real problem of getting dumped is not that you are with you ex girlfriend anymore. The danger the potential of taking the wrong decision after she dumps you. You can “Man the fuck up” and meet other girls and deal with your emotional pain instead of wallowing in self pity and crying in the corner of your room.
When I broke up with the “woman of my life” I was devastated for about 18 months! I regret being in a very bad emotional state for so long! That was a year and a half of my youth… its ridiculous! During that time I went out and had more than half a dozen of girls but nothing that made me forget her.
My self esteem was non existent, I didn’t have fun anywhere and I was always think about what it “could have been when I was still with her…”
The problem was in how I viewed life, I was feeling like a victim because I had various problems at the same time. In reality I was looking at the memory of a passed relationship and evangelizing it as a fix for all my other problems. My life was good when I was with that girl and she was sort of an anchor to the good life I had.
When I started working on other parts of my life like friendships, health and fitness, money and relationships it became apparent to me that my ex girlfriend was actually an impediment to my life.
I remember vividly how bad I felt and how happy I was with her at the time… It was a nice time with her but I wouldn’t have wanted to stay with her forever. Meanwhile I met so many beautiful women, travelled, evolved my business and became a better and more fulfilled person.
To be a happy person you have to be able to live with yourself. What I mean by this is that you should strive to be a happy single person, and from then on you will have a much easier time feeling happy and attracting healthy and better relationships. To know more about how to get your ex girlfriend back, create attraction or to seduce women check out the other articles about the subject.
If you have any comments, suggestions or personal experiences you would like to share please use the comment form below! I hope you enjoyed the article!